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  • Writer's pictureNicholas Fagen

Rough Draft(s)

Updated: Mar 15, 2023

Recall a split-second you dreadfully & sincerely wondered to yourself:

"How will I ever get over this?"

Whatever "this" stands for in your unique story...


We've all had similarly lonesome instances where a trusted confidante somehow unbelievably could not have felt any further away ๐Ÿ˜”


But you're still here...are you not? ๐Ÿ‘€

Absolutely, you are! 100% ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ


As Dr. Joe Dispenza says:

"We are defined by our adversity."

As Marie Forleo says:

"Everything is figureoutable."

As Dr. Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt said in her 2023 release Badass Stories:

"Imagine if your story was written by somebody else.
Wouldn't you find some level of admiration or even inspiration?"

I know that I would! How about you, reader? ๐Ÿค”


Through strenuous breakups, powerful grief, influential feuds, livelihood hardships, and/or monetary struggles, we've all ignorantly learned a distinct lesson (at one point or another) that life isn't as certain as we tend to assume โŒ


Life is a rough draft โœ๏ธ


Or rather...a series of rough drafts ๐Ÿ—“๏ธ

ย 
"Even the careless driver who cut you off in traffic feels unsettlingly worried, uncomfortably anxious or unbearably distracted about a particular person, place or thing ๐Ÿš™
We ALL have minds evidently plagued by a prevalent, well-known thought, often one of our own making ๐Ÿ’ญ
One that weโ€™d wish nearly anything away to be able to entirely ignore ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿผ"
ย 

Sure...it would feel indescribably marvelous to know the destination of your journey(s) prior to setting out on them...wouldn't it?

Realistically...how much of your growth would you be squandering entirely for a mere sense of avoiding a bit of uncomfortable confrontation? ๐Ÿค”

Trust me, I hate that I'm saying it too...but โฌ‡๏ธ


A complicated life is still worth feeling immense gratitude over โค๏ธ


For example, the juggernaut of a job market is nearly impossible to navigate these days ๐Ÿ˜ฉ


I recently discovered that the job market today is worse than it's been in over 50 years.


Every time I visit LinkedIn, I swear every post on my feed is captioned with #layoffs or #opentowork โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿฉน


But! ๐Ÿ‘‡๐Ÿผ


That doesn't mean we should give up and simply settle, right?


Positives are repeatedly hidden within negatives if you keep your chin up & eyes open ๐Ÿ‘€


Keep in mind that I've had a bit of experience in this arena.


(Skip past this tiny section to hear less about me ๐Ÿ‘‡๐Ÿผ)

ย 

In my case, if I weren't laid off back in early 2022, I would've never:

  • Launched a freelance career

  • Failed (a lot) before flourishing

  • Redesigned my website front-to-back

  • Crafted a vast portfolio featuring new references

  • Set time aside to write personally & professionally

  • Earned certifications in digital and promotional marketing tactics

And of course, the most important:

  • Lost 30+ pounds ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿผ

  • Inscribed 2nd Edition's for grateful loved ones ๐Ÿ’–

  • Took up DJing as a delightfully challenging hobby ๐ŸŽถ

  • Caught up on every favorite show, book, and series ๐Ÿ“บ

  • Spent precious moments with family, friends, and doggos ๐Ÿถ

ย 

If you know me, you know of a literal lifetime of working toward the ability to compliment myself, though that's not our focus today โฌ‡๏ธ


As Jay Shetty notes in his 2020 release Think Like a Monk:

"We are defined by the narrative that we write for ourselves every day."

Powerful, huh? ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ


My question to you, reader, is this:


How are you talking to yourself?


In your pending rough draft(s), what vocabulary are you using in conversations with you?


Jay Shetty continues: โฌ‡๏ธ

"We say things to ourselves that we would never say to people we love.
We all know the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
To that I would add: Treat yourself with the same love and respect you want to show others."

I'll be the first to admit that I can be awfully crude to myself.


I wish that weren't the truth, but it is. I'm improving, though ๐Ÿ“ˆ


In all seriousness, many of us fit all too easily into these vile shoes ๐Ÿ‘Ÿ


Other than continuously outting myself again & again (at the expense of a timid childhood personality of reputable secrecy and modesty), the only real way for us (as a collective group) to revel in satisfaction is to eye ourselves in the mirror and ask:


"What am I writing in my rough draft(s)?" โœ๏ธ


And thoroughly remember that...they're rough drafts! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ


They won't be published until long after we've departed this planet ๐ŸŒŽ

ย 

Dive deep & indulge me for a second:


Let's get serious.


Step into the shoes of your past self ๐Ÿ‘ž


Visualize 3-5 moments (in your lifetime) that felt legitimately insurmountable. The conceivable idea to conquer these forgotten milestones of the past were once a dreamy, unrealistic fairytale.


It would've felt like less of a fantasy to conquer Everest โ›ฐ๏ธ


Have you ever sat down and wholly revisited these terrifying seconds that you've willingly blocked out of your memory bank? (Unless, of course, that's just me? ๐Ÿ˜…)


My stubborn conscience refused to reminisce on occasions when I wholeheartedly didn't like the person that I was whatsoever. It's sad, though transparently true.


But if I willingly ignore times overflowing with insecurity, self-doubt, and swarms of unmanageable worry? What exactly am I left with? How does one take note of progress without a notable starting point? ๐Ÿ“ˆ


That's the thing...they cannot.

ย 

The past is unchangeable & the future is unknowable.


The present is a sequence of countless unending opportunities to reinvent yourself (using the inspiringly dynamic duo: the context of the past plus the achievable promise of the future) โœจ


Allow me to rephrase my point a different way:


Say you're happily married in 2023.


Bravo! Cheers! Hats off to you ๐ŸŽฉ


Wind the clocks back 5-10 years, however...


You haven't met your lovable partner just yet.


Instead, you're in a relationship with someone else ๐Ÿซข

Perhaps cringey to revisit, but assuredly worth it ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ


Trust me, we're not calling or texting anyone today โŒ


But stick with me here...โฌ‡๏ธ


Believe it or not, this person brought value into your life (and continues to do so!) ๐Ÿ˜ณ


Let me explain โฌ‡๏ธ


This is the human being who displayed the future of what you're romantically in search of ๐Ÿ”


Without them, you may halt the development of your personality significantly! After all, how do you learn the right one without experiencing the wrong one?


Every experience you endure/enjoy is part of the journey ๐Ÿ˜Š


That journey is what made you!


As Oprah famously said:

"No experience is ever wasted, everything has meaning."

On top of that, she added:

"Everything that is happening to you is being drawn into your life as a means to help you evolve into who you were really meant to be here on Earth."

Everything is a matter of perspective ๐Ÿง 


Hollywood provides countess examples of this ๐ŸŽฅ


Rocky could've called it quits after Apollo squandered his reputation to the press ๐ŸฅŠ


Eminem could've fled into self-pity and never appeared at the final battle ๐ŸŽค


Luke could've been too distraught to take on Vader after losing Ben ๐Ÿš€


Simba could've used overwhelm to turn a blind eye to Pride Rock ๐Ÿฆ


We could go on for days but here's the point โฌ‡๏ธ


A traffic jam causes distress until you've been laid off.


A layoff feels like a tragedy until you've experienced the loss of a loved one.


A stain on your shirt feels like a disaster until you've just survived a car accident.


A parking ticket feels like a catastrophe until you've endured heartbreak from a breakup.


Again, we could go on for days, but I'll cut us all some slack ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ


After all, none of us have it figured out, am I right? ๐Ÿ˜…

If I could hit you with a friendly piece of advice before you go...


It'd be to kick off your morning in the best way possible โ˜€๏ธ


Ultimately, mornings are the essential building blocks to the mindsets we construct throughout our day ๐Ÿ’ก


Mornings become afternoons, afternoons become evenings ๐ŸŒ™


Therefore, they're more like the kickstart to our entire life ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿผ


Find what works for your mornings & stick to it ๐ŸŒž


Can't figure it out? It'll come to you ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Until then, Bon Voyage! Thanks for reading along ๐Ÿ™‚


Keep track of your rough draft(s) ๐Ÿ˜Š


And above all, be kind (to others and yourself!) ๐Ÿ’•

ย 
"What if kindness were our currency? ๐Ÿ’ฐ
... life can throw you some of the highest highs and lowest lows within a matter of months, weeks, or days.
...life holds a distinctly melancholy role of controlling the tempo & tone of how we tend to carry ourselves, with the ability to surprise you with effortless smiles at any given second ๐Ÿ˜Œ
How do you want your story to end? ๐Ÿค”
After all, itโ€™s not a final draft until itโ€™s over" โœจ
ย 

Everyone's rough draft is messy ๐Ÿ’ก


That's what makes life beautiful ๐Ÿ’–


We're all just trying our best ๐Ÿ˜Œ

But until next time...

I'll be posting again real soon ๐Ÿ˜Š


โค๏ธ ๐Ÿงก ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’œ

โค๏ธ ๐Ÿงก ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’œ

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